Kinky Sex is Sneaking Its Way to Many Bedrooms: Here’s How to Start Feeling Kinky

You might have probably heard about kinky sex. If neither of your friends or your partner has introduced the idea to you, it might be that they’re too shy to admit their kinky sex fantasies. Studies confirm that less than 20 percent of people have tried kinky sex but a greater number liked the idea of it.

There’s no formal definition of kinky sex but it’s considered as something beyond the common or conventional sex practices. Anything that goes beyond the ordinary is considered kinky. Because fewer people are open to talking about kinky sex, lots of misconceptions are attached to the idea.

Your conservative friend might tell you kinky sex is about violence and abusive sex, which is farther from the truth. Kinky sex is about experimentation that, yes, might involve slapping, spanking, and what others consider as BDSM, which stands for Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, Sadism, and Masochism. Despite these extreme words, kinky sex is not as bad as how it appears. Kinky sex is not the same as abusive or violent sex. It’s more on the fun and adventurous side of sex that involves some instruments like a whip, handcuff, and others. Adults stores offer a variety of instruments for kinky sex.

Another misconception revolving around kinky sex is that couples who practice it have psychological problems. While there might be individuals whose idea of sex involves intense physical pain, the really problematic ones, it doesn’t mean everybody who enjoys kinky sex are problematic. Studies even show that couples who incorporate BDSM plays in their sex life have a higher psychological capacity and lesser neurological problems. To ease yourself up, here are the things you need to know about kinky sex:

Acts that are categorized as kinky

• Experimentation

Kinky sex is about the experimentation of your boundaries. It’s about the sexual fantasies and adventures you want to try and how far can you go. It’s about breaking those boundaries and testing your limits. Some folks might not admit it but research shows some couples are into role-playing, spanking, and tying up each other.

• Imagination

Kinky sex challenges your creative imagination and supports your fantasies. While some couples go to the extent of wearing costumes, others just talk about their fantasies in bed. They imagine scenarios they want to try and use anything they have at hand. For example, using pillowcases to tie each other instead of buying real handcuffs.

• Sexual fetish

This refers to the arousal you get in response to a nonsexual object. In kinky sex, you need to have the object of your attraction at hand to increase your sexual excitement and get an erection. Some common fetishes include high heeled shoes, stockings, underwear, or skirts. Partners with fetish want their partner to wear furry animal costumes or wear them on their own. Body parts like feet or body features can also evoke someone’s fetish inclinations.

• Voyeurism

Getting pleasure while watching someone undress or have sex without their knowledge is just human instinct. Though this is often considered as pathetic and a violation of human privacy, others considered this as kinky. What they have in mind is not about the couple engaging in sex, but they, themselves, being placed in that drama. Others say it’s a real-life porno where they feel aroused in the climax. It engages their fantasies and the role they play in that make-believe world.

• Public sex

Having sex in public and not getting caught can be someone’s sex fantasy. The idea can be nerve-wracking but, for some, the adrenaline rush of the fear of getting caught is quite amazing. Couples who engage in this kinky sex are not there to offend anyone but do it anyway for the fun of it. All because the thought of being an exhibitionist without becoming one gives them the thrill. Besides, the key to not getting caught in public sex is to not involve anyone without their consent.

• Threesomes and more

Group sex is kinky. The fun you get in this experience depends largely on the company you’re with. Some say sex parties are enjoyable while others say it’s not. If you want to see for yourself how it goes, make sure to choose the right people who won’t put your expectations down.

Kinky sex is beneficial

• Kinky sex enhances brain functions

For those who are putting down kinky sex, think again. A recent study reveals that kinky sex can be beneficial for the brain. The experience creates changes in your cortisol levels causing a decrease in your psychological and physical stress, making you happier, lengthening your life span, and improving your coping skills.

• Kinky sex boosts confidence

With lower levels of stress hormones, your self-esteem and confidence naturally increase. Being confident in yourself leads to better relationships and more productivity at work.

• Kinky sex improves relationships

You’d find deeper intimacy with your partner because kinky sex not only establishes a deeper connection but it also gives both of you more fun, which leads to good feelings about oneself and each other.

• Kinky sex reduces anxiety

Taking opposite roles in BDSM, like volunteering to be submissive after being dominant brings the mind to an altered state of consciousness leading to more awareness and being able to see things from a broader perspective. An altered state of consciousness normally happens during a yoga class.

Important things to consider before engaging in kinky sex

• Both men and women feel it

Disregard the idea that kinky fantasies are only for men. Women are on the same boat too and are as sexually curious as men.

• You’re not insane when you try kinky

People often misjudged BDSM practitioners as abusive or violent. As long as you’re not creating harm on yourself and your partner for the sake of playful and adventurous sex, you’re psychologically healthy.

• Prioritize safety

Even if kinky involves a degree of pain, make sure to keep your bedroom safety for sex. When you’re incorporating spanking into the play, make sure you’ll not be causing damage to tissues or nerves. You’re there to give each other pleasure and not to inflict unbearable pain. At the end of the day, it’s the positive experience that truly matters.

• There should always be consent

Don’t proceed with doing things when the other party isn’t happy with it. Consent is important, especially when they need to fulfill specific roles that they aren’t sure about.

• Set limits

Draw a clear line between what’s allowed and what’s not. Be open to set clear boundaries so as not to cause unbearable physical pain on each other.

• Never forget intimacy and connection

Kinky is created for fun and for the relationship to stay afloat. Showing care for each other, particularly after each session, is vital in the relationship. Nurture your partner with love and affection to make sure they’re okay.